lifeaftr | October Intro: Aftermath Mingle

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October Intro: Aftermath Mingle

Who: All!
What: Now that you've all committed monkey genocide, it's time to clean up and go home.
When: Evening of the intro log- and onwards!
Where: The Monkey Compound, Islets, etc.
Warnings: Mark as you go!

Congratulations on effectively reversing the tables, adventurers. As the hunted become the hunters, the remaining simians begin to retreat into the jungle, disappearing from sight as the drumming dies down, before extinguishing entirely.

It appears that you have won.

Now it's time to clean up.

Those still in the Monkey Compound may wish to begin scavenging what they can, from multiple coconut guns to rudimentary spears. There's a flock of Bludroc happy to be herded to a new home, several stashes of fresh fruit to be found... and a rather large iron pot, for the particularly bold.

Others may be more concerned with returning to the islets and securing the personal belongings that were left behind. There are new people to settle in, as well; and undoubtedly, a few injuries yet to be healed.

Reunite, rejoice, recover. And perhaps, should you see the Storyteller about- ask a few questions.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Tim's departure is acknowledged with a distracted nod- belated and unseen. They know- that they need to speak to him about Brian. They need to check up on Frisk. They need to confirm that Sans has recovered from the hallucinogenic effects of that plant creature. They need to make sure Wade is safe. Tibia. They need to see Frisk- and multiple other people, if only in passing. Long enough for a cursory glance, long enough to prove they're still here, still in one piece.

Things never stop, do they? Asriel's voice assaults their ears, question after question that he doesn't give them the time to answer as he holds out his hands, seeking out physical comfort. Heaven for him and hell for them. There's too much to think of, to much happening, and Chara's only response for a moment is a high strung giggle, fingers twitching away from him as if some magical barrier has been erected.

There's a tinny ringing in their ears, again, accompanied by the fierce, near painful rush of their blood, pushed through their body by a heart that keeps going solely out of spite to the person it keeps alive.

It was so hot, and there were guns and spears everywhere, and it was just like-

Don't. Don't say it. Don't finish that thought. Reaching up, they catch his furred hand in their own, drawing them back down. A compromise.

"How am I supposed to answer if you keep asking so many questions?"

Two questions, and he's asking too many. He giggles a bit, even if it's syrupy and hiccuping. Chara's trying so, so hard not to show it. They're trying to be strong. They're trying to be brave. They're trying to be here for him. But... they know each other better than anyone else, right? Best friends forever. He knows what that flinch and that laugh mean. He knows what that calm deflection means.

"Sorry. I know I'm being too much," he murmurs, punctuating it with a long, gross sniff. Yuck. He's so gross. Stupid, snotty crybaby. "I'm sorry for - for everything, Chara." If they were almost boiled alive too, if they were cornered by strangers with hateful, assuming faces, if they cried into the darkness for help... he can't go acting this coddled. He can't assume he's the only one who needs comfort. He has so, so much to make up for. How can he make this about his own stupid feelings when he doesn't even have feelings? You're not really bothered by a village full of violence, Asriel. You don't feel anything at all about it.

"I'm sorry for not saying no until it was too late. I'm sorry for making you suffer. I'm sorry I wasn't there for you - or - or if I was, I'm sorry for not remembering it." He doesn't - his understanding is still so vague. The man Chara called Mr. Wright says he's familiar, already known, but he can't make the connection between this vague Castle and this place, can't even begin to guess what he's ruined, what he's lost, what else is already over before he could even reach it.

"You don't have to hold on if it doesn't help you. I'm sorry for grabbing."

Of all times- after so much time

Why now?

Why is he apologizing now?

It's a struggle, to try and hide their response. To attempt to keep it off their face, smile slipping until they force it back into place. They give his paws a squeeze- so he won't feel the tremor in their fingers. Despite his offer, they don't let go.

They were never as good at it as he is.

They can't. They can't do this right now. In fact- they can't do this. Ever. He thinks them as brave and in control, but for once, they're going to take the coward's option. Consciously, Chara opts to only focus on as much of his words as they feel they can answer.

"You're hardly accountable for not remembering things you never took part in. Forget what he said," A slight pause. "It doesn't matter."

"I'm sorry anyway," he answers, still hiccuping pathetically. How can it not matter? He still has to deal with the fallout of it. Still has to deal with an unfamiliar adult having a horrifyingly intimate knowledge of him and everything he ever wanted to just keep all to himself. Still has to know that - that he had a SOUL! He had a SOUL for that stranger to resonate with, and now he has to live with the knowledge that he was whole and complete and fixed and had it ripped out of his hands?

How can it not matter, if it might have affected Chara?

"That man... he knows everything," Asriel whimpers. "He - he might know about the plan, and it's all my fault." What if he blames Chara? What if he takes those stolen memories about their insistence that they unleash their power, fight back, defend themselves, take six by force if they have to, and he assumes that makes them dangerous? What if he poisons this whole place's view of them? Chara... hated humanity. Why, they never said, but they felt very strongly about that.

Given that little glimpse of humanity he had, given what they did to Chara and Asriel - and claimed it was for Chara, righteous, what they would have wanted - he... he can't rule out that they would protect themselves in the exact same way here. He can't completely trust that they wouldn't turn hostile on an outsider, a threat, a bad person. He knows what the Underground thought about a person who was willing to kill even once. (Who gets to LV2 on accident?) He knows what he thought about - about... ha ha. Hey, Frisk, he did the right thing, didn't he? He doesn't regret it. It was Chara who wanted to unleash their power. It was them who hated humanity, Frisk!

He's poisoned people's thoughts about what kind of person Chara is. It's all his fault.

"I only just got here, and I've already made things worse for you, Chara. How can that possibly not matter?"

"He already knew about it." And maybe that's not the most reassuring comment to make. It's certainly not something they're happy with, even now; there's no urge to explain that further- to confide in how Tim had treated their own SOUL, when given access to it.

Like a crutch. A thing to use for his own purposes. They wonder if that's how it had felt for Asriel, when they picked up their own body, and walked through the barrier. Into the sunset, towards their death.

Ha ha.

It's no wonder that he stopped caring about them.

"However he explained...the connection between the two of you. I also experienced the same with him. He's aware, whether we like it or not." And that's all there is to it.

I only just got here, and I've already made things worse for you, Chara.

Yes he has. The situation simply grows more complicated, with each new arrival who knows them. His disappearance had been-

It had been. There wasn't anything else to take from it, past the relief of losing one more threat to their plans. They had no more room for anything else. No time for it.

"...You make things more complicated." Their lips twitch, some shade of a genuine smile. "But since when was that new?"

Asriel gasps quietly, breath sticking in his throat sharply. That man... he did it to Chara, too.

He remembers what they felt, when the two of them strode out onto that flowerbed. Their emotions had been all bleeding together. Chara hated humanity... and at the root of that hate? Under the tangled, thorny brambles of fury and disgust lurked fear. Revulsion at being rendered powerless, at knowing that the authority around them could and would wrench consent and control away from them on a whim.

That man... he took that from them, too. Asriel can't even begin to guess how much more invasive, repulsive, horrifying it must have been for them. Nothing distresses Chara more than to have someone else rip control away from them.

(Ha ha. Look who's talking.)

"I'm sorry," he says again, even if it feels woefully inadequate. "I can't even imagine how horrible that felt. You've had enough things taken away from you already."

He has to force himself not to tug a hand away to wipe his sleeve over his dumb gross face. It feels like if he lets go now, he'll never get to hold on to them ever again. It feels like if he lets go now, his arm will fade away into dust and leave nothing behind but thorny vines. It feels like...

Like he wishes that just once, his still being here could make things better.

"...I guess it really isn't anything new," he agrees. "But that's... okay, right? Is it okay? We - we can be together again. We can play like we used to. We can stay up past bedtime whispering to each other, and eat snacks with our bare hands, and share our toys... even if they don't really interest you. Even if - I guess we don't really have toys anymore, do we?"

All the things he thought he had to say goodbye to. The things that used to make Chara smile like they meant it. Maybe they can have that back, after all...? Maybe... maybe it isn't as completely ruined as Asriel feared it was. If he can be with Chara again, then he'd put up with anything. If he can just have his best friend back, then nothing humanity can try to impose on him can hurt him, right?

It would be really nice, right about now, if he stopped being so considerate. Stopped acting like what they thought and felt mattered- dropped the pretense, went back to what he's best at. Being self-centered and thinking of no one past himself.

This can't be real. It can't be real, this precarious balance between getting their brother back, and getting a complete stranger. They want him to remind them of blades slicing through their palm, of laying in a bed for the third time, stricken, with little to no care for their well-being.

Instead, he reminds them of wet hugs and tree-houses. Those small, fragile things they'd promised Frisk they were willing to leave behind.

It's not fair.

"...It's not that simple." Chara eventually responds, keeping their voice level. Civil. This is not the way this story is supposed to go. This is not the conversation they should be having.

They let go of his hands, because they shouldn't be doing that either. Stand, and brush off their pants, as if they've somehow accrued dust from where Chara had been crouched in the soil.

"I- promise. We will explain it to you. But it's not my story to tell alone..." They look down at him, lips pursing.

"And perhaps- you're not ready for more stories, tonight."

They let go.

It takes all the willpower he can muster to not reach after them.

They stand up.

His chest lurches with the irrational fluttering terror that they're going to leave him, disappear, vanish to someplace he'll never again be able to reach them.

He rests his paws on his lap. Lets the tips of his claws poke little holes into his pants, prickle through the fur at his knees.

"I don't understand," Asriel answers. They promise to explain when they think he's ready, and he'd never doubt you, Chara, but... god, he wants it to be that simple. Why can't it be that simple? All they need is each other. They can do anything, as long as they have each other. The only thing he needs to be happy is to have his best friend beside him.

"I'm already in this too far to turn back halfway, aren't I?" He already knows too much. They hated his tendency to falter right at the brink, after he was already knee-deep in it. So he shouldn't hesitate now, right? "Whether I'm ready or not, Chara, I'm already here."

He's already here- and already overwhelmed, just from one issue brought to his attention. Pretending to be brave, as if he hadn't been crying minutes ago, barely able to stand on his own two feet.

They don't know if they really understand him, anymore. And the urge to laugh is there, because he spent countless timelines without them. How is it that they feel the least prepared to handle him, when they've already done it before?

This is the part where they push him away, again. This is the part where they tell him that what he's done is unforgivable, that they don't want anything to do with him. That if he thinks of telling anyone who they are- who Frisk is, they will return the favor in full. This is the part where they shatter this illusion, this false sense of...care. The determined look on his face as he tells them, whether he's ready or not, that he's already here.

That's not what happens.

"...The castle Tim spoke to you of is called Sol Raveh. I was there for ten months, more or less. Frisk for slightly longer."

If you don't want someone to recognize you, Tim had advised, voice soft. then you hide your face.

It's too late for that, now. Tim has ensured that; absent and collecting Frisk, wherever they may be. Chara is alone. There's no Partner to corroborate their story. To let them know they're saying the right thing.

"Things happen, in places such as these. Friends turn to enemies in the blink of an eye. Which is precisely what happened to us, close to the end of our time in that castle."

So they do what they do best. Meeting him eye for eye-

"Some of those people are here. In order for us to survive, their memories were tampered with. But should they realize who we are? Both Frisk and myself will be in considerable danger."

They lie.

"Some of those people are from the Underground. We've changed our hair. Our names. Our history. Whatever it takes to stay alive and fix what has been broken."

They doubt that it sounds very believable. And yet, before them sits the boy who would listen avidly to any tall tale they had to tell. The names of constellations that didn't exist. Human practices that had never happened. It's just a cold, Asriel. It means I'm getting even stronger. Humans don't cry, it's too weak.

If anyone would believe this- believe something that's pulled together moments before escaping their mouth? Asriel would.

"Thus...it's not that simple. Claiming to know me, before you arrived here?

"It could kill Frisk and I both."

People from the Underground... turning against them? It's... well, it's not like he can really say "monsters would never try to kill a human child," can he? He can't even pretend that monsters would never kill Frisk. Caring about them never really meant they did much to guarantee Frisk's safety at all, at least not until the very last moment of the very last timeline.

But that was... they did it because they thought they had to. Because they needed SOULs to be free. Why would they want to kill Frisk and Chara now? Why would anything that happened in some far off castle still have any hold over them whatsoever now? Moreover, how? How could they have tampered with peoples' memories? Even if Frisk's determination had far exceeded his, but Undyne's goofy claims about humans having mind control powers had been nothing but anime garbage.

You'll have to take my memories, too.

There was... one way. One way to make people forget. Did they... but then if they Reset, why would they have to keep hiding from everyone? Every time they started a new timeline back home, even if Undyne despised them, even if Alphys wished she'd killed them when she had the chance, even if the Monster Kid hates their guts... they still met them all again. Still became their friends.

He... knows how liberating putting on a mask can feel, though, can't he? Howdy! He's not the fallen prince, he's not the sweet, selfless person you used to know! He's Flowey the Flower! Don't think of it as really him when he burns every book, when he kills everyone, when he taunts Snowdrake until he breaks down in tears.

But... aren't they all past that, now? Didn't Frisk fight so hard to stop that power because they'd had enough of that kill-or-be-killed game?

And why does Tim know? He's from the castle too. He's way less trustworthy than anyone from the underground, because he really did take their soul and all its secrets without permission. Why not modify his memories too? This whole thing... this whole thing stinks to high heaven. Does Chara think he's an idiot? A naive, sheltered little baby?

...That's not fair. He'd never doubt Chara. Everything went so badly because he doubted Chara when it was too late to turn back. If you can't trust your best friend in the world, then who can you trust? They'd never lie to him. They'd kept secrets sometimes, but they trusted him with the very culmination of their being. They care about him. They'd always cared about him more than anyone else. There... has to be a reason they'd cut themselves off from everyone who loves them. There has to be a reason they... they're going to do the same to him, then, aren't they? It'd all fall apart if he went around saying they were his best friend, his sibling. His love would ruin them.

Asriel looks away, his shoulders slumping. Tries to keep his expression from getting too bitter. Thinks hard about what he wants to say.

"Chara..." He begins quietly.

"Just tell me one thing. And, please... tell me the truth."

"Are you... happier, living like this?"

Are they-

Silence. His question sits between them in the air, a thick and heavy thing. Full of... ha. Ha ha.

They don't even have the word for it. It's not judgmental. It's not kind, nor gentle. It is simply there, and Chara can't help but hate it. Hate him for it. Are they happier, living like this?

No. No they aren't happy. They aren't happy, to have been forgotten- left behind again, to bear the brunt of that consequence on their own. They aren't happy, to have a skeleton greet them like a stranger. To watch a pokemon shy away from their very presence, because they told her they couldn't be there, anymore. To watch a man take care of another child- a better one. He took her in, and forgot all about them.

None of the people they knew really exist anymore. It's the very opposite of what was intended, a plan that they

Never really wanted. A plan that meant putting everyone else aside, for Frisk. Just for Frisk. Human's are selfish- their Partner potentially the most selfish of all.

But they needed each other. And now? They were all they had left.

That's their fault, isn't it?

"...Since when has happiness had anything to do with it?"

It's not polite, to answer a question with a question. But that's all they have, offering a hand to help him stand, smile fixed in place.

He knows you, Chara. You had a soulmate before Frisk.

He knows what it means when they answer with fixed smiles and bitter rhetorical questions. He knows what they're saying when they offer him a hand even though they already let go, even though they don't like touch, even though they surely must be tired of carrying his weight.

Asriel does not take their hand.

Even though we're standing side by side, even though we're closer to each other than to anyone else in the world, even though we're friends forever, we don't join hands. No matter how forlorn we are, we each insist on standing on our own two feet.

"Since now," he answers, corners of his mouth falling. "Chara, I know... love and sacrifice are the same thing in your heart. But... your happiness is important to me. I want to try and protect it a little better than I had been." He'd been more concerned with not making them mad at him than with what would have kept them safe. Believed a little too hard that being friends meant never saying no. Meant you'd give up everything for someone, meant you'd compromise all your beliefs if they asked it of you.

Maybe Chara believed that, too.

"Suffering for everyone else's sake... that's not real happiness. Not if it comes at your expense. I don't want you to be alone anymore, Chara. I don't want you to have to pretend like you're okay with what's happening if you aren't. I... maybe it's selfish, but I don't think I can lock you out of my heart. I spent lifetimes looking for you - looking for a world that still had love in it. If I have a chance at that here, then... then what about you? How can I shut you out of that world?"

"So my happiness matters now, does it?" The retort is immediate, escaping without thought. They stare down at him, smile growing all the wider. "And how do you propose that you'll enforce such a thing? Shall you ensure I am happy, even if you have to kill me one hundred, million times?"

Ha ha.

They're not being fair. He's not being fair- acting like their happiness has ever had anything to do with his actions, rather than snaring them within his greedy hold and never letting go. He wants them to stop pretending. He wants them to accept him; to cave to the idea that they can be together again. Better than that- he can take care of them, now. He holds the key to their happiness.

"I already have my chance at happiness, Asriel. I know where I want to be. If you truly wish for me to be happy, then you will accept what I am telling you."

You will do as they say.

"I am no longer your sibling. I am no longer the fallen human. If these are terms that you cannot accept, then there is no room for you in my life."

They've lost him before.

They can do it a fifth time.

"That's... that's cold, Chara. I love you, but this is cruel, and you know it is." They'll hate him for saying so. He knows they'll cut into him for such a childish, babying, poor-me answer. They don't much care for his feeble little no's.

But... it isn't. My happiness matters now, they say, as if he had never agreed to gather buttercups because it was what they wanted, what they insisted he had to do. As if refusing to kill was the same thing as taking away their happiness. They use words that... that Frisk must have told to them at some point, maybe, when they lived in that castle together, because he had to have been mistaken in the timeline when he announced the fallen human was as empty inside as he was. No hard feelings about back then, right?

No hard feelings.

"You have to know. If you know I said something as awful as that, then you know... you know how finding you again was the only thing I had left. You know how it feels when the first thing you do is make me choose exactly which way you're going to throw me away." They haven't said "I'm sorry." They haven't said "I missed you." They haven't said "I'm glad to see you again" or "I forgive you" or "we can still be friends." Just - just that he makes things complicated. Just that they aren't his sibling anymore. Just that there's no room in their life for people who doubt, who say I don't like this.

Is he allowed to say that hurts?

Maybe it's selfish to be hurt. Being hurt means being unable to accept their terms. He's said he's hurt, and he knows - he knows that means they'll uproot him like a useless, stupid weed. They're the one who suffered, Asriel. They're the one who's been hurt, who never knew the bright, safe existence you did until they fell into your life. They're not the one who got to come back. How can you possibly be making this about yourself when Chara's the one who needs compassion and safety, not you?

It's not like he even CAN hurt, is it? What he feels now isn't real. Soulless creatures don't love. They must know that, too. Maybe that's why they're so distant, businesslike, quick to dust their hands clean of him. They know he must not really care at all, deep down, about this. He already KNOWS this is all ruined, after all. He went ahead and spoiled himself on that one! Surprise! You never had a chance of living in a world with love after all! You really ARE an idiot!

"I don't like this plan," he says, staring at the ground, sniffling, eyes watering anew, but he doesn't mumble. "I don't like this, Chara," he says, loudly and plainly.

Oh, he doesn't like this plan now, does he? He doesn't like having options; doesn't like it when someone makes the decision to cut him out, like their very opinion of him has switched somewhere in the last five minutes?

How lovely for him.

"You love me?" Their tone is entirely too incredulous. The memory is there, and it's as sharp and as painful as the day it occurred. The smile on his face; the utter lack of hesitation as he stood there in the sunshine, on the edge of a bed of golden flowers. "Did you love me, when you decided I wasn't the greatest person? Did you love me, when Frisk was the friend you always wanted?"

He can't tell them he regrets it. Can't tell them he wasn't thinking- can't regret those hard choices the rest of your life, right, Asriel?

"What right do you have to tell me how this hurts, Asriel Dreemurr? That you don't like this plan? You have the gall to tell me I know how this feels."

Laughter. Cold, derisive laughter.

Does he know how it feels, to watch someone stand at your grave, and throw you away? To shout, to scream, to have no one hear you- except the human in which you reside. The very same human who must act as if they have no comprehension, no issue.

Why should they allow him to say this hurts, when they never had a chance? Why should they take his tears with a smile and a shrug of their shoulders, instead of clenched fists and a steadily rising voice?

"You abandoned me. You disowned me. And you want me to care if this hurts you. Tell me again, Asriel. Go ahead. When did my happiness matter?!"

He knew they would cut into him, and cut into him they do. Abandoned them? Disowned them? Is that - why would they think something like that? What was Frisk telling them? What part of - what part of... How can they jeer him for his awful, horrible threats to keep them around even if you have to kill me one hundred, million times and then say he abandoned them? How could they possibly think that when... when...

"I'm not ready for this to end."

How many timelines did he spend looking for them?

"I'm not ready for you to leave."

He'd wished on every single glittering stone in Waterfall's ceiling.

"I'm not ready to say goodbye to someone like you again."

Did they hear him calling them, even once?

"You - you really think..." Their laughter, furious and steel-sharp, cuts into him, but he laughs right back. He'd be mortified how Floweyish that high-pitched, horrible noise is, if he were thinking a little more.

"You really want to know what made Frisk the friend I always wished I had? They FORGAVE me. They still listened to my apology even if I wasn't being a perfect little angel! You... you're throwing me out because I said you weren't great? You're telling me you won't love me the second I do or say one thing that isn't just - just going along with whatever you want. You haven't even apologized or said one thing to me about what happened! You just started telling me what to do to protect your own plans!"

This is too Flowey. This is too Flowey. You can't say no to Chara. You know you can't say no to Chara, because -

"What gives you the right to say I never cared about your happiness when I DIED because you never once listened when I said no to you? When as soon as I'm not a perfectly obedient puppet, you threaten to leave me all alone?"

There's a horrible, hot-cold band of iron constricting around his throat, his chest, burning in his eyes. He can't breathe. He - he's being too Flowey. There's no chance, now, that they'll love him. There's no chance they'll forgive him. He should be grovelling on his knees for them to give him a chance, to let him do whatever they want, just to be with them again! He shouldn't be acting this - this selfishly! What's WRONG with him?!

"You've got to be kidding me." The more he snarls and spits, the uglier their own expression gets. How wonderful Frisk is, forgiving him on the spot! How good a friend they are, listening to the reasoning behind why he killed them over and over!

What kind of friend is Chara, in comparison? Refusing to listen, trying to keep together something that they've been working on for months? How dare they imply that Asriel may have to play a different role, here? How dare they not consider that he died-- for them????

"You didn't die for me, idiot! You never died for me! You died for YOURSELF. You died so at the end of the day, you could tell people that poor you, it wasn't YOUR FAULT. That evil Chara picked up their own body! That evil Chara just wanted to kill!"

They step forward; just so they can tower over him. Glare and gnash their teeth, fingers clenched into fists so tight, their knuckles go white.

"We had a plan! We were going to save everyone! Everyone could have seen the sunlight, until you decided to be a selfish, spineless brat! I DIED FOR YOU."

"...But when did that matter?"

Of course it doesn't. It's a shift in reality, almost- how the world turns from vibrant and too hot, throat sickly with unspoken barbs and LOVE, to something grey and far away. Chara doesn't fight it at all. It's preferable.

Because they wanted to die anyway, right? Chara could have chosen any method, at any moment. They weren't happy, they weren't content. They never experienced a sensation of safety, or family. Not once.

It's not good enough if they had ulterior motives. You took too much, too quickly, Chara.

Look at what you've done. You had one chance, to make your existence remotely worthwhile. And you ruined it.

"Forget it. I'll put this in terms even you can understand."

They shouldn't have bothered. It was always going to end up like this; because they're not the greatest person. They should stick to what they're good at- blackmail. Deception. Threats.

That's all he really wants from them.

"If you feel compelled to tell everyone about who I am, I will return the favor, Flowey. Is that threatening enough? Or shall I try harder?"

How can they miss the point this much? He says that their refusal to listen to him ended up getting him killed, and they lord it over him that they died for him despite him saying he didn't want that? They assume the problem isn't the "you don't compromise for my needs but expect me to make massive compromises for yours" but some kind of - that the way he died was some kind of stupid power play?

How can they say he owes him for the plan he protested from the start? How can they say he owes them for the thing that murdered him? "I told ONE person!" He answers incredulously, pulling on his ears. Ooh, Chara, caught him red handed! His cunningly planned manipulative scheme to save face with one single near-random kid he'll only meet a billion years after the fact has been totally seen through!

It's positively maddening, the way it affects him so much, and they can just - just stop caring about it right away. They're not even bothered! They don't care if they hurt him! They don't care about him at all! They don't care about his apologies, his regrets, his grief, his worry, his hopes that they can - they can do a little better this time, they can both somehow get over this heartache, they can...

It's already in ashes.

Funny. The second half of the quote he'd hurled in their face burns just as keenly in his chest as it did back then.

"Chara..."

I'm so alone, Chara...

I'm so afraid, Chara...

"Chara, I... I..."

He seizes the front of his shirt, twists up fistfuls of fabric.

"I'm so sorry."

They really hate him that much?

"I don't want threats. I don't want yelling. I know you - I know what I want doesn't matter, but I don't." All that painful, desperate yearning... it had never been so they could get into some kind of martyr olympics. It hadn't been for this. He'd wanted back what he used to have. Chara, smiling behind an armful of flowers. A world where they had a future, both of them. A world where they both belonged. A way to - a hope of reconciliation, of somehow recovering from this, of mending the cracks in their hearts.

But that's just a fantasy, isn't it?

"...Is this how it has to be?" Being nice... just means you get hurt, huh? You made such a great friend, and now you'll never see them again. Not to mention how much they've been set back by you...

Hurts, doesn't it?

"If it won't make you happy... if I leave you alone, will that at least bring you peace?"

"I gave you my reasons. I told you that no one could know our connections- did I specifically state that you could have nothing to do with me, or was that just something you decided for yourself?"

Best to think the absolute worst of them. Best to believe that they're abandoning him, rather than simply avoiding a worse fate. He stops yelling, but they refuse to turn away from the internal ice they've found. It's what keeps them standing tall, helps them continue to stare at him without flinching.

"It's hardly my fault that you immediately assumed I was abandoning you. That said, I think you've made your opinions of me more than clear, yes?" So why complain? Look at that, Asriel- apparently, they were doing you a favor all along! Now you don't have to worry about someone who won't believe you, someone who tosses you out the second you stop believing in them.

I care about you more than anyone else.

You're the only one who understands me.

Have they ever? Have they ever truly understood him, before they were ripped from their world? Dumped into misty castles and horrid, tropical islands where he could be as selfish as he wants, whenever he wants? It's not often that Chara would admit to making a mistake. But it's clear they misjudged him.

He's not simply spoiled and selfish due to being an only child. Clearly, it runs far deeper than that.

"I asked you to help me keep Frisk safe. I asked you to help keep me safe. I would have thought that at least the former would mean something to you." A thin smile. "It would have to my brother."

He opens his mouth to protest that they did, very explicitly, state that he could have nothing to do with them unless he did exactly as they said - unless he was content to exist at the periphery of this new perfectly happy existence as an unacknowledged outsider. Unless he was fine with not being their brother, with not being their best friend, with not being the very things that Asriel had lived to be. How is that not...

He exhales.

"You win."

What's the point of arguing? Why fight so hard to keep them around, if... well, nobody was going to let him win a game like this in the first place. It's already ruined. Chara doesn't want him. Chara doesn't think he's their brother anymore. He can't be the perfectly happy, useful, smiling person he used to be. He's dead weight at this point, so... just do what you can do for them. Stop doubting them.

"If I'm the one last threat to your happiness, then... I understand." Keep them safe from this dubious, contradictory threat. Let them go. "You've found the friend you always wished you had. You have a second chance. I won't sabotage that. I... I'll let you live your life. I hope that someday... even if you can't be happy now, you find it eventually."

It's fine. He'd already come to terms, after all, with reality. There's no such thing, for him, as the future he'd been wishing for. He already knows that the best thing to do for everyone is find somewhere quiet and isolated, and wait until Asriel is gone for good. He knows. Fighting that is just... this is just painful. Impossible. The Floweys out there - Floweys like him - don't get to just brush off the person they've become. You get what you deserve, in the end, and this is what he deserves.

He brushes himself off. Makes himself look at them once more. Makes himself acknowledge the disgust in their smile, the scorn in their voice, the utter absence of love in their eyes. Wake up, Asriel. This is what the world is really like. No more rosy fantasies.

"Then... I guess I should be going. I... tell Frisk I hope you're both okay with - with whatever that guy's name was. Mr. Right? Sorry, I never - he didn't introduce himself."

"Would you at least-" Wait for Frisk? Let them speak for themself? Stop putting words in their mouth, deciding how much or how little they wish to do with him at any given moment?

But Chara doesn't complete the demand. A deep breath, as they flex their fingers. Breathe. Breathe. He makes things more complicated. It's what he does.

And if this is the way he has chosen to interpret their initial explanation, then who are they to argue? It certainly solves any complexities that may have been caused by his inclusion in this; no threat that someone would see the two of them together. No constant anxiety, about someone putting two and two together.

He thinks this is what they want? Fine.

Fine.

One would think they hadn't learned their lesson by now, continuing to argue against the inevitable.

"His name is Tim." They say blankly, unable to parse any semblance of emotion into their words. And that is probably for the best, as well. It's all for the best. "I'll be sure to give Frisk your regards."

He was making to leave on his own- but he should know better, shouldn't he? Chara is far too selfish to allow him that pride, far too selfish to have the last action ripped away from them.

They have nothing to say, anyway. So with that, they turn on their heel--

And leave, before he steals that action from them yet again.

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October Intro: Aftermath Mingle

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