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lifeaftr2018-05-27 10:52 am
savedbyasong) wrote in lifeaftr2018-05-27 10:52 am
When you awaken in the morning's hush (open!)
Who: Shion and open!
What: Shion works on the memorial garden, followed by some training and finally quiet reflection. I will match formats!
When: 27th May. All day.
Where: Story Tellers temple, Islet 4
Warnings: General self decrepting thoughts, threads might contain casual mentions of horror and existational nonesense because it's Shion. But I'll add if anything specific comes up.
Do not stand at my grave and weap; I am not there I do not sleep
Shion had been quiet since the attack on Bliss. He had a lot to think about and he knew everyone else did too. But broaching difficult subjects was not something he was particularly good at. Not when he was aware that it was sensitive. He had just made sure he was visable in case anyone wanted to talk. He had spent the days working on the garden, fixing the house, playing with the cats.
He was at the Story Tellers Temple today. He tried to go at least every few days to check the message rock. The list of the missing had more names on it, including Yuka. He had been expecting that, he had continued to go to the room of glyphs in case she turned up there, but it seemed she really was gone.
He memorised the names and went over to where he had began his memory garden. He had left some coconut bowls there in case anyone else had wished to add their own memorial. He took some now, writing the names on them in chalk. Many were people he did not know. It didn't matter. He would still remember.
He moved between the beach and the temple, collecting sea shells to decorate. He was soon deep in his work, but he would still look up and greet anyone who he passed.
I am a thousand winds that blow; I am the diamond glints on snow
He had looked at the calender, he knew the date. Three years. Sort of. Three years since Reno had given him the pin and challenged him to do better. It felt like a life time ago, even if some of those months were missing. He had still been so young. Broken and self pitying. Weak.
He still was. Was again rather. The months of living on this island had raised his general fitness, it was not as difficult as when he had first arrived here with his old body, weak and used to hardship. But he was still not as strong as he had been... four months? One year? Time was fake but he still could do with being stronger.
So for most of the afternoon Shion can be found training. Running laps around the iselts. Basic strength excersizes outside his house, pushups and such. He pushes himself hard, not letting himself rest even when he is exhausted and every muscle is screaming at him to stop. It had been hard three years ago as well. This time he has no teacher, no stern but patient Reno to tell him to keep going. But he has his own determination, he knows what his aim is.
He practices fighting drills as well, fighting thin air with a grim look on his face. He should have done this months ago, rather than getting swept away with everything. He continues training through the day.
I am the soft stars that shine at night; Do not stand at my grave and cry
Finally Shion stopped, washed up and took a coconut bowl of water to drink. He sat on the grass near his house, watching the ocean quietly.
He missed Reno. All the time but today was especially sharp. He often did things that he knew would disappoint his dad, he wasn't a good enough brother to Aster, he had made a million mistakes since arriving on these islands. Lost control. Got into petty fights.
But this time... He had saved Aster. It had hurt but she was alive. They had killed Bliss. Gladio had been right when they had spoken. Sometimes being nice was not an option. Shion had known that, known if for a long time. But it seemed everything lately... he had had to be cruel, hurt others all in the name of saving them. Would Reno be proud of him for that?
He had no idea and Reno was a somewhere out in the multiverse. The pain of missing him was sharper because he had been in his dream and in Aster's dream. A Reno happy and content, with Elena. He wondered where Reno really was, on his world? Or somewhere else? Stolen to another place...
He stared out at the ocean a thousand thoughts crowding into his mind at once. Worries for Aster, for Ceej, for Ren. Worries about how they were going to leave here and if they should. If Tim was right and in doing so they would cause damage beyond repair. Worry for the Story Teller. Wondering about Stories and sequals. He let his mind drift, lost in his thoughts.
What: Shion works on the memorial garden, followed by some training and finally quiet reflection. I will match formats!
When: 27th May. All day.
Where: Story Tellers temple, Islet 4
Warnings: General self decrepting thoughts, threads might contain casual mentions of horror and existational nonesense because it's Shion. But I'll add if anything specific comes up.
Do not stand at my grave and weap; I am not there I do not sleep
Shion had been quiet since the attack on Bliss. He had a lot to think about and he knew everyone else did too. But broaching difficult subjects was not something he was particularly good at. Not when he was aware that it was sensitive. He had just made sure he was visable in case anyone wanted to talk. He had spent the days working on the garden, fixing the house, playing with the cats.
He was at the Story Tellers Temple today. He tried to go at least every few days to check the message rock. The list of the missing had more names on it, including Yuka. He had been expecting that, he had continued to go to the room of glyphs in case she turned up there, but it seemed she really was gone.
He memorised the names and went over to where he had began his memory garden. He had left some coconut bowls there in case anyone else had wished to add their own memorial. He took some now, writing the names on them in chalk. Many were people he did not know. It didn't matter. He would still remember.
He moved between the beach and the temple, collecting sea shells to decorate. He was soon deep in his work, but he would still look up and greet anyone who he passed.
I am a thousand winds that blow; I am the diamond glints on snow
He had looked at the calender, he knew the date. Three years. Sort of. Three years since Reno had given him the pin and challenged him to do better. It felt like a life time ago, even if some of those months were missing. He had still been so young. Broken and self pitying. Weak.
He still was. Was again rather. The months of living on this island had raised his general fitness, it was not as difficult as when he had first arrived here with his old body, weak and used to hardship. But he was still not as strong as he had been... four months? One year? Time was fake but he still could do with being stronger.
So for most of the afternoon Shion can be found training. Running laps around the iselts. Basic strength excersizes outside his house, pushups and such. He pushes himself hard, not letting himself rest even when he is exhausted and every muscle is screaming at him to stop. It had been hard three years ago as well. This time he has no teacher, no stern but patient Reno to tell him to keep going. But he has his own determination, he knows what his aim is.
He practices fighting drills as well, fighting thin air with a grim look on his face. He should have done this months ago, rather than getting swept away with everything. He continues training through the day.
I am the soft stars that shine at night; Do not stand at my grave and cry
Finally Shion stopped, washed up and took a coconut bowl of water to drink. He sat on the grass near his house, watching the ocean quietly.
He missed Reno. All the time but today was especially sharp. He often did things that he knew would disappoint his dad, he wasn't a good enough brother to Aster, he had made a million mistakes since arriving on these islands. Lost control. Got into petty fights.
But this time... He had saved Aster. It had hurt but she was alive. They had killed Bliss. Gladio had been right when they had spoken. Sometimes being nice was not an option. Shion had known that, known if for a long time. But it seemed everything lately... he had had to be cruel, hurt others all in the name of saving them. Would Reno be proud of him for that?
He had no idea and Reno was a somewhere out in the multiverse. The pain of missing him was sharper because he had been in his dream and in Aster's dream. A Reno happy and content, with Elena. He wondered where Reno really was, on his world? Or somewhere else? Stolen to another place...
He stared out at the ocean a thousand thoughts crowding into his mind at once. Worries for Aster, for Ceej, for Ren. Worries about how they were going to leave here and if they should. If Tim was right and in doing so they would cause damage beyond repair. Worry for the Story Teller. Wondering about Stories and sequals. He let his mind drift, lost in his thoughts.
no subject
"It must be strange." He murmurs, dropping his hand and moving away. "No one knows? Even that campfire jerk?" He means the Storyteller. He hadn't told any stories. He hadn't seen the point. But the fact that this memorial garden exists means that people here cared enough to get attached to the ones they lost. It seems pretty messed up to him.
no subject
Of course in the Tower it had been true, people disappeared for short periods or forever, those that came back had spent the time wandering their dead world, devoid of any life. Shion had wandered his. Here though... Asgore had no memories of the time he had been missing.
It might be that they might return but the world not restart from whatever suspended animation affect it was under. He's seen Jaune's name on there as well and he glances at the boy.
"Is that your full name?"
no subject
"Hm? Yeah. It is." He averts his eyes, rubbing the back of his neck. It's just weird. It's too surreal for him to grasp. He extends his hand. "Can I see your chalk for a second?"
no subject
Shion had never ran into another version of himself and he thought it would be weird. Weirder still to find that a version of him had been in a place and now was gone.
He watched Jaune, concerned for him but giving him silence and space to process his words.
no subject
Biting his lip, he marked Weiss's out after a second. Even if at some point she had ended up here, she wasn't now. He hadn't seen her. If she ever returned (doubtful), then he was sparing her some awkward, disconcerting pain of being treated like she was dead. He handed Shion back the chalk.
"Thanks. ...Can I do anything?"
no subject
"There are many worlds. Infinite worlds. Some are as different as mine is to yours. Some are like this world that pull people from other worlds into them. Some are very similar. Some are so similar that they have the same people in them, sometimes there are big differences but other times it's like the worlds are identical. But somewhere a choice was made that meant that the worlds are not completely identical." It's confusing and terrifying to hear it for the first time.
"These worlds that pull people in... Sometimes they pull more than one version of the same person. So you are Jaune, and that Jaune," He gestured to the crossed out name, "Was here before. His world might be very similar, or different in some way to yours. Where I was before there were often two or three people who were identical. I met... someone from my world. Who I know but who was from a place where my eyes turned purple, not red. Often people find friends but their worlds work on slightly different times so their memories match to a point but then one remembers more."
He smiled gently.
no subject
And then he went on to mentioning another him, making him scoff before he could stop himself. "Are you sure he just wasn't colorblind or trying to deceive you?" Red could look purple in some lights. There was a strain in his voice that hadn't been there before.
"There are things on my world that exist that might seem unbelievable to you, because they are to me. Magic, stuff like that which isn't meant to exist. So when you talk about there being other versions of ourselves, I don't know what to think..." His smile was empty, falling into a cold glare. "But if some other me really was here, or whatever, then he wouldn't want other people to waste their time remembering. It's not like I died."
"I'm sick of being looked at like I'm a ghost." He admitted, anger leaking into his voice. That pressure had moved from his chest to his head, like the ocean roaring against his ears. His armor felt more like a prison than protection. But when he smiled at Shion, despite the conflicting emotions in his eyes, it was sincere. "So thank you for not treating me like one."
no subject
He reached out to take Jaune's hand. Touch always calmed him and Jaune needed to calm, Shion understood all to well how it was to be overwhelmed, to not understand everything that you were being told.
As he continued, thanking Shion he reached out to take his other hand as well. "You aren't a ghost but if people want to remember the other you..." He breathed himself, pausing to consider his words. "Remembering if often for those left behind, it helps them and it's not that they think he's dead... It's just they miss him."
It was a lot to wrap his head round, Shion understood that. "I know it's difficult... I... I left my world three and a half years ago, perhaps more." There had been enough talk of suspended animation for him to worry that it had been longer, but three and a half years was roughly right. "So I've had a lot of time to get used to things... there is no magic or anything on my world... but I've accepted that it exists and... a lot of things that I thought were true and absolute are not."
He has every faith that Jaune will get used to it too.
no subject
Just like before, the touch grounded him, kept him from spiraling further. He had been distancing himself for months now, but ever since arriving here, that had amplified. Connection and support meant a lot to him. The tense line of his mouth had faltered somewhat and his eyes had started to pink a little but he didn't break down. He tilted his head away to look down. They shouldn't miss him. It was a waste of energy and time. But three years...? He couldn't, there was no way. Gasping in horror, his breath began to quicken as he tried to calm himself down. He couldn't leave his world for years. He was finally useful. Maybe others mattered more but he couldn't just abandon them.
He went quiet for a while, trying to shut down. He couldn't just accept this information. If there was a way that worlds pulled people in, there had to be a way to send them back. But no one had found it yet. Who knew how long this had been going on. For Shion, it was three years, but who wasn't to say it hadn't been occurring indefinitely? All of these were questions no doubt that everyone experiencing this had asked, and he was hardly the best equipped person to figure it out. He glanced back over to face him, his voice quiet. "When I first met you, I thought you might have been from our world. There's a town where I'm from that shares your name, so it'd make sense if you were named after the color of it, since that's a tradition on our world. But some things and people don't come back no matter how much we miss them."
"Do you ever miss your world, Shion? Do you ever think you'll return? What is it that keeps you going?"
no subject
A town in Jaune's world was called Shion? He guessed that wasn't so odd, to have a town named after a flower. Some places didn't come back... That place was gone. It was true that missing people didn't bring them back. But that didn't mean remembering them was useless. It helped to remember even if it were painful as well.
The question... That was painful as well. "I... It's complicated." Breathing, focusing. He closed his eyes for a moment. "I... When me and Aster left the last place we were... We were going home. I guess I let myself believe that at last but then I ended up here." He shook his head, "I miss my mum... But I had left my home before I left my world, I knew I might never see her again... I miss Rat but..." That's a complicated box of snakes and he's stearing away from that. He misses Rat but he's changed so much and he wonders what it would even be like to go back when Rat... He was dead until recently like the rest of his world and now in some kind of suspended animation, unless he had been spirited off somewhere as well. He had seen a thousand futures though and in every one Rat left, disappeared in the night, wandered off into the wilderness. He had fought to return, to save Safu but...
He shakes his head. "I had a reason to return... but I don't... I'm too late. Safu... my friend. I thought I could save her." But she was dead. "I want to leave here, Aster... she needs to get home. She has a lot to fix in her world and I'm going to make sure she get's there..."
What keeps him going? Aster mostly. Mixed with determination and the fact that if he gave up he would be betraying everything that Reno had taught him. Breaking the unspoken promise that had been made three years ago.
no subject
"I miss my mom too. And my dad...and my sisters." He wore a wobbly, sad smile. "Aster's someone important to you? Maybe-- Maybe you two were meant to be the real Flower Power." Oh. Shion wouldn't understand that reference though. He didn't need to hear him voice it outright to figure out what might have happened to Safu. The pain of losing a friend was something he knew deeply, and sometimes there was nothing you could say.
"I'll help you." His voice was small, the breeze lilting through the leaves almost swallowing it, but his breathing had calmed. "We'll make sure she gets back. And maybe you can go home with her... Is she here?"
no subject
Somehow. Despite them leaving the Tower together. It was on the list of things that didn't make sense and Shion was trying not to think about.
"We'll make sure we all escape here. To go home or wherever we wish." He squeezed Jaune's hand, happy for the offer, happy that Jaune had calmed enough to make it. Not that he had any ideas, no idea how they were here or who was keeping them here. Never mind how to get out.
"You'll have to come and meet her at some point."
no subject
He smiled, trying to be reassuring and strong when it was Shion who had kept him grounded to begin with. He didn't have the answers, didn't even know where to start, but he had found some direction. "If there's a way we got in, that means there's a way out. I know we'll find a way."
"I'd like that. My schedule's pretty open right now," He grinned wryly.
no subject
It still was a lot of the time. "I'm sure she will be happy to meet you." He smiled and turned back to the coconut bowl he was preparing. "The seashell thing is her idea, in the last place we were whenever someone disappeared for good a grave would appear. It was... They were empty but we made it a place to remember even if I think it was created to... upset us." As so much had been.
"She used to leave sea shells for her friends, it seemed a good thing to use here as well."
no subject
"Well, I think we've got plenty of shells to use." Hopefully they wouldn't run low on them.
no subject
Except he doesn't want to scare Jaune, not anymore than he has already. "It was a Tower of over a hundred floors, there were many people there. There were many monsters and a lot of the floors were dangerous if not deadly. We were..." He picked up a couple of sea shells and arranged them on the bowl of sand for Gabe. "The adminstrators had power over us and they saw us as prisoners at best." His voice is barely steady, but he's still calm, focusing on not upsetting Jaune.
He doesn't know who Gabe was so he is making a generic pattern with the shells. "But the people there were mostly nice. That's where I met Aster and Reno... he adopted us both. I found a family and that made everything else barable."
I'm sorry!!
"What kind of sick psychopaths would do such a thing?" Even with all its dangers, this place seemed like a paradise compared to that. "So Reno's kind of like your dad?" He wasn't sure what Reno was like, so he began imagining his own dad.
no worries!
"Ruana was a child, hundreds of years old but a child nonetheless, who had been experimented on and hurt just as much, if not more than she went on to hurt us..." He shook his head.
Reno was a much better topic, "He is, in the Tower we were in dorms of four and had to sleep in our designated... bed or we would get sick. He arrived a few months after I did and we were roommates. He began training me at first informally but then..."
He could talk about many things that happened in the tower, sometimes even without fear or sadnesss. But that week in that cell, that was locked deep inside him and only nightmares brought it to the surface. He had spoken about it once, to Diarmuid, he wasn't ready to do again.
"Something happened, I was hurt badly... not physically. But mentally. I scared Reno pretty badly and he made me an offer. To train me properly, join his group. Be better than the mess I was..."
He smiled, "Becoming his son came later but it's three years ago today that I accepted his offer. Sort of... I've missed a few months. Time is strange."
no subject
There were more details to Shion's story that he didn't seem comfortable with sharing. Jaune may not have understood the full extent of mental pain and trauma Shion and the others faced, but it wasn't something anyone should have gone through. Especially someone who had been as kind as Shion. He tried reaching out to hold his hand, hoping to return some of the reassurance Shion had given him multiple times.
"Reno sounds like a pretty cool guy. If you're here, then I hope that means he'll arrive too someday- The one you know, I mean." He frantically corrected himself, offering a nervous smile.
no subject
"I hope not. I love him and miss him... so much that it hurts. But... we fought to go home. I hope that he is home. That he returned to his world like me and Aster should have. This place isn't as bad as the tower... But no one should be stolen from their world."
As much as he wished to see Reno again, Reno being safe was a million times more important.