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live mas

Who: Taako, otawg (open to all w goods)
What: 'i can't believe Taako invented wal-mart'--Zero
When: 8/16 and on? if you want the full inventory
Where: The ruins
Warnings: Spicy

The meeting with the shitty god-rabbit had clarified not a whole lot, if Taako is being honest. But one thing is clear, they (this entire island of randos) are in it for awhile, so they (Taako and Lup) need to be in it to win it. And on this island, winning it means selling anything you can get your hands on for anything that might be useful. Their ice cream social had been moderately successful, and the horrible hustle elves are doubling down on their established niche, now that they realize the full stakes.

To that end, you can peruse an up-to-date inventory here. During daylight hours, there is a very good chance you can find a makeshift setup of warez, with the tired but socially effervescent elf responsible close by. There's existing stock, in very limited quantities, of small things. There's a list with everything else. The wood sign just says 'Got Stuff?' as kind of a preliminary; the argument re: naming convention is ongoing and bloodshed may be imminent. Bring your A-game hagglewise, and remember that a neutral feedback is the same as a negative.

[I should clarify, you can thread with both twins but the default setting is Taako unless otherwise specified! Up 2 you! Not fussy!]

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[He's doing pretty well himself, and she's enjoying that- it's nice to play with someone who knows how the game works.]

Needs must, as they say- about how large a blanket would you prefer?

Now they're talking. "For just the flint and tinder, it'd probably not be that big. Say, five by four?" He'll just use that sweet elven Dex to sleep like a dead spider. Whoops, don't think about dead spiders. "I can hang onto it for you. What name should I put on it, my friend?" He'll throw in something else if he has to, but how expensive is silk?

That's certainly doable- I can weave it out for you here, although it'll take a little while.

[She'll probably need a good meal and a decent nap before she tries spinning much else after doing that much at once, but she wasn't planning on doing any other spinning today, and if she needs to stick something to something else in an emergency there's always magic anyway.]

My name is Muffet. And you, dear clever salesman?

That gives him the rest of the joke, an old standby, ends with 'holy shit, it's a talking muffin.' And dang, the talking muffin works fast, Taako looks suitably impressed, and it's not wholly a storemanaging act. What a well heeled spider. Usually spider themed humanoids are a little more adversarial than just some enjoyable haggling. "Taako. And I'm more than just a pretty storefront, you know. I'm a wizard, and a chef. You'll have to come back for some of the real homemade goods. Repeat business is a requirement, here."

[No, no, the talking muffin is her pet. Y'know, assuming you consider roaring noises and trying to bite things to be talking.]

Ah, always a pleasure to meet someone with an appreciation for the culinary arts. Do you have a particular specialty? I make my living back home as a baker, myself.

[She works briskly, steadily weaving out more silk in an even rhythm. Not quite done, but she's making good progress.]

You know what, spiders get a bad rap, that's dope as hell. And he thinks this as someone who does magical arts n crafts on the reg. Taako leans on the counter, messily pushing aside a bunch of said crafts, watching the weaving with fascination in his otherwise lazy demeanor. "Oh, I do it all, sweet, savory, the works. Some baking, I make some pretty baller macaroons, I've been told." Lup had said, about the pistachios, which stuck in his mind more than the spider bit honestly, so he knows not to jump to bugs straight away. Which is a shame, he's heard some interesting things about cricket flour. "You know, if you're into pistachios, you oughta try making macaroons with them. Some sea salt, some caramel. Could be a winner." Less of a travesty than putting them in brownies, anyway.

[Improving the life of spiderkind, one person at a time- there's the goal. So she'll forgive him and his sister for being wrong about brownies.]

Good to have a wide repertoire, yes. I did a fair bit with sea salt caramel a few months ago because it was popular at the time- might be a good time to bring a few of those recipes back, given that we have at least one ingredient in abundance.

[She gestures at the ocean with a wry smile to illustrate her point. Finishing up the last few rows, she unfurls the blanket and eyes it thoughtfully.]

Is this about the length you wanted, dearie?

Taako offers a round of polite but still sincerely enthused applause. Man has he come down in the world, it's just a blanket--albeit a purple silk one made by a big damn spider. So actually, you know what, he stands by it. "That's just perfect darling, thank you. I'm going to be the comfiest person on the whole island." He's going to be a pretzel of limbs and ears, but that's probably the same thing.

"And you know, if you find yourself with an abundance of coconuts, I can make the rest of the caramel ingredients happen," he says, with the air of someone proposing a drug deal. Given the island's dearth of real sweets, that's probably about what it'll be, soon enough. "Indistinguishable from the real thing. Well, probably almost. Even a transmutation wizard has limits on dairy-free island." Listen, spider, we're bffs (baking friends forever) now.

[Muffet smiles and tries not to preen too obviously- she's always enjoyed a good compliment. Sure, she'd do things that need doing even without recognition, but it's just nice to be appreciated.]

My pleasure, and I wish you sweet dreams with it.

[She folds the blanket neatly and puts it down on the table in front of him.]

Ooh, now that would be a lovely opportunity. I can't say transmutation is a type of magic I'm familiar with, but it sounds quite useful. And who knows- there might be some kind of cattle around here somewhere, if we can find them.

[Hell yes, baking friends. She's pretty sure you don't normally find cows on tropical islands, but she's also pretty sure that this isn't a normal island, so.]

Taako in turn puts the flint and steel prominently where she can grab it, and he's honestly more than happy to give it up. It's not useful, of course, but also if she's aiming to cook meaningfully on this dumb island she'll need every advantage, and he respects that. Man, this store thing is really working out to everyone's advantage, even his, even with him being honest about it, which is pretty wild.

"Yeah I can't wait to see this island's take on cows, after the whole tigershark thing. Literally, tiger-sharks," he makes a little 'you see what I have to put up with?' gesture. "At least the coconuts aren't part goat, or whatever. I mean, I can transmute coconut into its various products--sugar, milk, oil, whatever. But weird hybrid fruits and milks?" He makes a sour face. Gone are the reckless days of transmuting foods with unknown properties, because they're out of extra lives and also it sucks when people die after eating your food. "Might get ugly."

[Muffet retrieves her purchase and stows it in her pack happily. It's always nice to have a win-win situation, and she's very glad to have a way to reliably make a proper cooking fire.]

Being unfamiliar with the practice, I'll take your word for it- no sense ignoring the experts, after all.

...Also, if it turns out the tiger-sharks are milkable, the Storyteller and I are going to have a very awkward talk next time they decide to speak with us. We can only hope they find more typical dairy sources to be more, ah, narratively compelling.

Yeah that shocks a laugh out of Taako. Being called an expert aside, none of those words had any business being in the same sentence, and he can appreciate that. Shit yeah, let's all kinkshame the rabbit. "I mean, you couldn't really beat milking a shark for drama, but yeah, let's hope they don't see it that way."

Actually, speaking of expertise, which they both clearly have plenty of, "Hey, what are you gonna do for an oven?" It's a sudden thought, because the realities of shit-tier island life are still sinking in. Taako sounds legitimately concerned. "It would take a lot of rocks, and it wouldn't be state of the art, but I could help you out, there. Wouldn't be something you'd wanna move though, kind of a permanent fixture. Maybe just think about it, start a rock pile." The fact that this is a paid service goes without saying, right? Right.

Drama or, depending on one's tastes, comedy.

[She smiles happily at his suggestion.]

I've been managing by cooking over open fires so far, since I was lucky enough to wind up with some cooking pots in with the supplies I was given upon arrival, but it's really not the same as a proper oven.

I haven't found somewhere I want to make a more permanent camp just yet- wanted to figure out more about the island, which places were safer or closer to various resources, and so on- but if you wouldn't object to my contacting you once I have a spot in mind...

[She'd never dream of cheating an honest businessman. ~~Or Taako, either.~~ For all her conniving little ways, Muffet has her pride- even if he never asked, she'd probably insist on getting him some of the first thing she baked, as repayment.]

"Oh hell yeah! Defs contact cha boy and I will make it happen." Taako grins back, just as delighted. Anyone who can joke about the comedy of milking sharks AND swap recipes is well on their way to being a valued social asset for sure. "Or Lup, if she's here and I'm not, whichever. But don't spread it around, I can't make all that many ovens." This is a special offer. Look at him, making a real (?) connection, founded on some kind of cooking empathy. Listen, it's progress, alright?

[She winks playfully- which is interesting to see, given how many eyes she has.]

My lips are sealed, dearie. I wish you and your sister the best of luck in your business ventures.

"Thanks, but we won't need it, unless someone else opens a store, right?" He winks back, much less interestingly, but that's life. "Come back any time. Especially if you've got anything else to trade."

[Don't think she hasn't considered it- but ultimately, Muffet views wealth as a tool to get things done, and she suspects it's not going to be the most useful tactic here.]

[Besides, she likes the twins. If she were going to set herself up as the competition, she'd at least give them the courtesy of a warning first.]

I'll look forward to it. Have a lovely day, and do tell your sister hello for me.

[She turns to leave, still very happy with having acquired a reliable method of fire starting.]

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live mas

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cricket flour is real bee tea dubs--and ive eaten it

Ooh, neat- I think I've heard of it but I've never tried any. What's it like?

grainy? but palatable overall

Huh, cool.

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Wrapping soon, I think.

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;;;;D Wrapped, unless you've got more to add.